This week has been all sorts of a derailment and half-assed attempts at fixing it.
It didn’t help that Tuesday was a disastrous evening that first didn’t let me get home until after 1am, and secondly unable to sleep until nearly 2:30 in the morning. To follow that, I had nightmares where I was choking someone (repeatedly) into submission, because they were annoying me for some reason or another. Unrelentingly annoying. I cannot fathom why else I would choke them until they would pass out.
Amidst all that disturbed (in more than one way) sleep, Wednesday was a melancholy mess that required a large amount of caffeine to get through. So much (that I overestimated) in fact, that I could not consume it all in the morning. I was still drinking it well into the afternoon in order to keep the numb feeling I had at bay. Unfortunately, drinking it as late as 4 in the afternoon was too late for me. I was left sleepless late into the night, not able to retire to bed until nearly late 1ish, despite my attempt to inebriate myself with three beers to counteract the caffeine.
So comes this morning. I woke up twice sharply throughout the night thanks to some thunderstorms that, try as I may, I could not bear to stay awake through. I woke up something around 7:30 in the morn, much to my utter disappoint and dismay. I really needed more sleep than that. Today I felt far less numb (putting off Tuesday night’s drama and nightmares in the distance), so I tread through the day without caffeine. My steam was nigh completely lost come 5pm, and I loathed the simplistic yet penultimate experimental setup of the day. It’s moments like that where I can really inadvertently fuck myself the following day by not having bacterial cultures to work with.
I collected myself on the porch with a book shortly after I got home, and nearly fell asleep in the process. I really wanted to sleep right there and then, but that would have likely been a big mistake (much like Cori accidentally did last night).
So here I am, trying to stay awake until 10pm, but I am really considering just retiring at 9, shortly after this post. The yawns are hitting me full-force, and my body is craving rest, despite the uncomfortable temperature and humidity in the apartment right now.
In less depressing news, I finally baked my first batch of blueberry zucchini bread, courtesy of an enormous zucchini from Kelly. The recipe that I used probably could afford to be tweaked a bit; it’s about as sweet (if not moreso) than the pumpkin bread I make every fall, so I need to dial back the sugar for the second batch I’m making this weekend.
In addition to the zucchini, I received a small plethora of banana peppers. I don’t think I’m interested in stuffing all (or even most) of them, as delicious as that sounds. Instead, I’m planning to jelly them with some sage and red onion! I’m inspired by the jalapeño jellies that I’ve tried, and although this won’t be nearly as hot, the potential richness of flavors is enticing! This will be an interesting experiment, however; I’ve never jammed nor jellied anything before. Time for a single-man disaster in the kitchen on these possibly cool and dreary days this weekend!
P.S. I marched up all six flights of stairs this morning with only a minor winding! I couldn’t believe it! 30ish miles of hiking and losing 15-20 pounds has apparently made this activity way more bearable. It might have to be worked into a regular occurrence going into work in the morning now to help resistance train for fall day hikes.