09. May 2010 · Write a comment · Categories: Rant · Tags:

WARNING: Whiny rant ahead

How does one know when to say, “No, that’s enough, I’ve spent enough time doing this?”

I am chronically wondering if I could have tried harder, despite the futile energy it feels it is taking up. I mean really, how much is too much?

I am also driven by the concern that what if it really has not been hard enough? Physical energy can be quatitatively estimated. Emotional energy can only be evaluated qualitatively, and thereby is looked upon by others arbitrarily, and can be judged as such. I know I shouldn’t be concerned what people think about that, but hello, that’s me!

Worse yet, how do you know when to come back to it with a fresh mind and try again? I can’t help but feel that this emotional/mental fatigue is a consequence of taking a break, and then feeling personally guilted into resuming the battle as opposed to really having cleansed the original incident from myself.

Just feeling mentally/emotionally discouraged (although physically I’m quite wiped as well, but that’s another story). I’ll get over it. However, I really hate feeling torn between what is enough and what isn’t.

*Cross-posted over at my estrip blog as well.

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